The Money Kings are keepin’ it real, baby!!!

For your consideration: Real Estate Profits And Losses. Scenario 21: Snake And Turtles!

Here’s a positive bit of news for you new landlords . . .

You arrive at your unit to collect rent, or maybe check on a repair, and you notice something different about your tenant’s space:

Before you get excited, The Money Kings want you to realize that, yes, your tenant having a snake in your unit might be a little creepy, BUT it’s much better than:

Here’s why:

• Snake = Slow
• Turtle = Quick (“What??!! Money King!!!!” Ever see a snake move fast? Turtles can cross quite a bit of ground when they get loose.)
• Snake = Eats infrequently (low cost to the tenant).
• Turtle = Eats every day and will eat as much food as you give it (Look this little fact up, if you don’t believe us.)
• Snake = Little to no scent. Little dung. Little clean up.
• Turtle = Very stinky. Much dung. Much clean up. (Clean up your lazy tenants probably WON’T do!)
• Snake = Quiet and lives long.
• Turtle = Quiet and lives longer!
• Snake = NONE of your tenant’s friends want to take it out of its cage to play, and therefore soil your carpet or ruin your floors.
• Turtle = ALL of your tenant’s friends want to take it out of its cage to play, and it will urinate on your carpets and possibly fall into your sump pump!
• Snake = NONE of your tenant’s friends want to touch. (low disease transfer risk)
• Turtle = All of your tenant’s friends want to at least touch, because it’s soooooo cute! (high disease transfer risk)
• Snake = Needs little to no water. (low cage tip-over risk to ruin your floors)
• Turtle = 50% chance of being aquatic. (just like a fish tank . . . high tip-over risk)
• Snake = Might scare burglars away from your unit.
• Turtle = 100% chance of not scaring away anyone from anywhere.
• Snake = Usually not owned by children or tenants with children.
• Turtle = Kid and adult-friendly!

Because of the following two facts:

• Snake = Ugly, infrequently poisonous, and commonly thought of in Satanic terms.
• Turtle = Mistakenly thought to be slow-moving, having round features, of small stature, and commonly thought of as cute and innocent.

A landlord’s first reaction to seeing a snake in a unit is to tell the tenant to leave or force the tenant to get rid of the snake, and a landlord’s first reaction to seeing a turtle in a unit is to simply overlook it.

Bottom line Money Kings Tip:

Take the first reaction toward the turtle and replace it with your first reaction toward the snake. The turtle is much more dangerous to your unit(s) vs. the snake. You want the snake. You want to get rid of the turtle and the turtle owner. This is the smart landlord’s choice.

Good luck out there.

Keywords: real estate, investing, income, tenants, snakes, turtles, pets, landlord